Orla Whalley

It’s easy to know when to go to your support group, right? When you need guidance, when you want some feedback on how you are being or just to check in and tell them how well you are doing.

But what about when things aren’t so great? I recently went through a period of ill health that left me absolutely physically drained and hurtling from one cough or cold to the next. I got sick of myself in the end – and I did something that seems completely backward to me now – I hid from my support network. I didn’t want to project this self that felt tired and ill all the time and who felt that even getting to the end of each day was some sort of personal challenge. It just felt wrong to own up to feeling like this in a culture of being ‘great’ where how I was feeling might be seen as a personal weakness.

It was only when one of my support team came looking for me that I realised I was trying to regroup on my own and to only contact people when I had ‘good’ news. Talking about how I really felt highlighted my mistake but also made me realise that it is sometimes hardest to use the support when we need it most.

I decided to check in with all the people in my support team who care about my emotional and physical wellbeing and without exception they all came back to me with words of support and advice on how to keep going forwards – and even just some much needed empathy. It was an eye opener to realise how others’ journeys have at some point echoed mine and what was even better – when I let people understand where I was at I didn’t get any sense of having become less of a person in their eyes.

This week take some time to reflect on the following questions:

How often do you put a brave face on how you are feeling and not use your support team for help and guidance? How ready are you to reach out to others who seem to be struggling and to be part of their support team? How easy is it for you to ask for help from others at work?

Orla Whalley is currently Finance Academy Manager at E.ON responsible for leading the redevelopment of the UK’s online Academy. She is also mum to two young children who are teaching her how to look at the world from a different perspective.